Whisper…

Posted: November 8, 2018 in 2011 - Jan1 thru Mar 31

When you have so very much to do. So very much to see. So very much to share…

NO DOUBT…Life can get away at times. Since the day I graduated high school, I have been an adventurer, risk taker, challenger, and many other things. I got married, raised my daughter and enjoyed the comfort of a happy active family, job security and a financially stable and fulfilling life…

Fast forward to the last 15 years, my life has rocked back and forth between very low lows and very high highs. In times of uncertainty, I questioned myself, my closest friends and even my family. Those times my strength was challenged, I struggled greatly but ultimately became my most creative self. Remaining content in my through everything, I was allowed to learn and better empathize with others. My strongest voice came through in the most creative ways. My voice was silent, but my visual art screamed my message.

In 2009, I [my vision] created a social experiment that began with a public art sculpture in Chapel Hill and reached people around the world. Subsequent artwork took on a whole new voice that was stronger and louder than ever. My creativity was recognized by leaders across the country and made me extremely proud. These experiences were and will continue to be used to encourage my creative peers in many ways.

My nature is to be private and somewhat calculated. I see myself one way while others may see me another way. My artwork styles change, my favorite color may change, and my passwords need to change from time to time. That being said, the one thing that does not change, is my passion for the arts and my desire to make a difference.

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I’ve always had a creative side. A little quirky a little indifferent. I yearn to be noticed but am highly nervous about standing out. I rarely follow the rules, forward paths or conventional recipes. My artwork mediums change as often as my sideline employments and some relationships. I have so many ideas and yet so little time! So, what’s a girl to do?!?!

Now I admit that my life has taken years of anxiety, excitement, and fatigue resulting in a roller coaster of emotions. I think friends would say I am a more quiet, private person and keep my issues much to myself. That being said, I’m done! 

With so much distress and chaos in the world today it is easy to overlook my own misfortunes. But, instead of brushing things under the rug, I’m thinking of being done with being silent. Or at least standing up for myself from here on out! 

I say this but not sure how I’ll go about this or what I’ll write but I’ll try to be honest, legit and helpful. After all, I have only eighty nine more days to figure things out….

Let’s start…

Posted: July 1, 2018 in 2011 - Jan1 thru Mar 31

Today marks a new day. Well, every day marks a new day but today I will start a new ninety-one day challenge. I’m not even sure I am aware of what that challenge will be yet but I trust that through my writing, it will come. 

The past year has been very emotionally taxing. I lost my mom somewhat unexpectedly and in the same year went through two jobs and moved for the third time in less than three years. I felt as though I would be better off tomorrow but tomorrow never seemed to happen.

I still feel defeated at times and continue to trudge forward as best I can. I went to a comedy show last evening and the comedian was talking about how he is happiest when he is on stage. Then he continued to say (seriously) that he really struggles with life when he is not on stage. 

While there was more to his delivery than just those two statements, it made me think a lot about what really makes me happy and when I am happiest… 

Say…Cheese!

Posted: June 24, 2018 in 2011 - Jan1 thru Mar 31

Could it Brie?

I’m on a quest for a bright, new, and very exciting path in life! Read more…

So I recently went to a house concert and the singer/songwriter was singing her heart out to a new song called “A Beautiful Mess”. I looked to the person next to me and whispered, that’s me…A Beautiful Mess. We laughed a little and decided things can only get better.

Fast forward to the interesting things that leave me with a sprinkle of optimism and I can say the good things that have happened and brought happiness in the past year is definitely friends, family and cheese!

About a year ago, I was running back and forth making the best of the two hour drive between the river and the city. It was at a Publix grocery store in New Bern that I found Wisconsin Cheese Curds for the first time! I was so excited I could hardly stand it! I was running through the store like a crazy person! IMG_4595

Then this cute guy at the kiosk selling pineapples asks me what I am going to make with the curds. I said, “what do you mean? I’m just going to eat them like this!” “What do you make?”

“Poutine!”

“What? … Poutine? What is that?”

“It’s a Canadian dish. Made with french fries, cheese curds and brown gravy…”

“Oh my! Sounds delicious and why have I never heard of this? I grew up in northern Wisconsin! I’ll have to try it!”

That weekend my friend and I went to a favorite restaurant. I brought the curds and asked the chef if she would make the poutine. She said we have curds here!

“What?”

“Yes! Look on the menu at our special burger”

There it was! A burger topped with melted cheese curds then a split bratwurst and finally sauerkraut and a lil dijon mustard. CRAZY! I did not try it but laughed and said that would be meal for the day!

She made the poutine and we all enjoyed it. That was just the beginning of my very cheesey journey. Many trips to Wisconsin and now here we are…

I recently entered the Wisconsin Grilled Cheese Sandwich contest. I did not win but with 1600 entries I was glad to have pulled up my big girl panties and give it a go! Besides, I learned a bit more about video editing and now have one more post on my You Tube channel! Here’s a pic of my yummy PC-BLFingT sandwich:

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Then after hitting it off for about an hour with this woman I met at a party, turn out her  cousin cooks for Kelly Ripa and hosts a Television cooking show in NYC specially geared toward the 40’s and above age group. “Perhaps I could get you hooked up with that”, she exclaimed! How awesome would that be?!?!

I still have a huge desire to start a food truck someday but for now I purchased a lil Smart Car. I call it my Humble Bee. Her name is sunshine and the license plate is Bee Artsy! I haven’t begun to paint her but I will surely incorporate Cheese, Packers and Wisconsin in there somehow! This car turns heads already but I can’t wait to find the true promo idea for instant gratification!IMG_0780

And finally, my friends and I love to get together to share stories, wine and good foods. It often consists of beautiful arrangements of cheeses, meats, fruits and nuts such as these beautiful displays we’ve created in the past. I have wonderful friends from all walks of life and I would truly have it no other way! My daughter is a professional Makeup Artist and loves to help me in the kitchen too. Her artistry takes on a different form but I love to learn from her too!

I’m not sure what will come next and neither do you. So, spread good vibes and stay tuned for more as my life takes on this new path…

I could go into a long, drawn out explanation as to why I’ve not written…but I won’t. Not right now. Life has been crazy. I’m happy and excited for the future one minute, then the next, I can dream of nothing but extreme quiet. Complete peace. A sea of feathers to float upon.

Truth is, little over a year ago I uprooted myself for the job of my dreams. Without hesitation I packed and moved two hours away to enthusiastically bring arts programming to eastern NC. When that job ended due to budget cuts, it was little less than devastating, both personally and financially. After the initial shock, I hung on and eventually felt content with the laid back lifestyle of living along the Pamlico River. My many friends kept me busy as I kept my head above water best I could. I found solace in the beautiful sunsets and the walks along the river were joyful with my little Frisco by my side.

Life wasn’t perfect but it was working itself out. The small company I began working at felt like family. It didn’t pay well but they had patience and respect for their employees. The owners would bring in a crockpot of beans and sausage and biscuits about once a month and the rest of us just shared M&Ms or JuJu’s every so often. It was those small, kind gestures that I will remember best. That and the watchful eye of Mr. Billy as he cautiously found trust in his son and the employees.

In late February, a friend called to ask if I could come help with his business. He would pay me a weekly salary. While I wanted to help, I couldn’t very well leave my current employer on such short notice. Plus, I wasn’t too excited to uproot my life again after little more than a year. My little Frisco was getting older and I was’t sure she could handle another move either. I said I’d give it some thought.

About a week went by and he called again. He really needed me or he was going to have to shut down the shop. I agreed to come and talk with him on Saturday. He agreed to a weekly salary. I would work Mon-Fri and would not be required to work on Saturday so long as he could cover. To help with the transition, he offered a room with a private bath at his apt, no charge. This is until my house is available in Sept or I find another place.

With a heavy heart, I went back to Washington to talk with my boss. We went for coffee and he said he thought I was going to ask for a raise. I smiled, and said no, I’m just sorry I need to leave my position on such short notice. Effective immediately. That day was to be my last day. That was on a Monday.

That same week Wednesday, March 3rd, I began my new job managing a small independently owned company for this friend. Today is Saturday, May 6th and, while I honestly feel I could love the job itself, I’m hoping I haven’t made a very big mistake…

TRIG Modern featuring my oil paintings, mixed media works! Artist reception First Friday, May 3, 5-9pm. Thru June 4. http://ow.ly/klyMQ

2 of my paintings featured in VAE’s show “Food for Thought”. Block Party tonight as well – d/t Raleigh. Don’t miss it!
http://ow.ly/aHG2h